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God's will for every Christian husband is to love his wife and lead his family in the same way that Christ loves and shepherds the church.
Take note, it is the husband who leads his wife and not the other way around, as Christ is the head of the church and also not the other way around.
No one can become a godly husband without following the perfect role model, Jesus Christ, on how He loved the church unconditionally. As husbands, we must carefully and purposely strive to follow Him, no matter how incompetent we may be at first.
Becoming a Christian means having a personal relationship with God through Jesus and not just joining a religious community. Having a genuine relationship with Christ will help us get to know Him more and thus we would also know what are the things to copy from Him.
Growing as a husband that God intends is a process. The speed depends on how you are willing to cooperate with God and how passionate you are to become one.
As husbands, we must do our own honest self-examination of our hearts' condition. We must acknowledge that the perfect standard can only come from God's Word and nothing else and we must be willing to pursue it.
Only a heart that is close to God, growing in knowledge and faith in Him, will be able to correctly follow Him and apply His principles in daily life.
A husband can be like Christ in character, behavior, and actions only if his thoughts and intentions are saturated by God and has a heart that seeks God first, loves Him more than he loves his wife, and has the desire to glorify Him with his life and everything that he does.
For a husband to effectively love and lead his wife and family, he must be under the guidance and submission of God Himself, conforming his life to His Word.
You will know a godly husband by the fruit that he bears, not only in character but also on how he handles his own family.